美文一：
Three O' Cat Is Still a Game
Lillian Bueno Mccue
What do I believe? What laws do I live by? There are so many answers - work, beauty, truth, love - and I hope I do live by in everyday things I live by the light of a supplementary set of laws. I'd better call them rules of thumb. Rules of thumb aren't very grand, but they do make the wheels go father and mother sent me to good schools, but the finest thing they did for my education was to have seven children. I was the oldest, and my brothers and sisters were my best teachers.
I learned first to pull my own weight in the boat. Kids making a bob-sled have no use for the loafer who wants a free ride. Neither has the world. I learned to make the bed I slept in, and wash the glass I used, and mend what I broke, and mop up where I spilled. And if I was too lazy or too dainty or too busy, and left it for someone else, somebody else soon taught me different.
Then, the same way, I learned that anger is a waste. It hurts nobody but me. A fit of the sullens got short shrift in our house. It wasn't pulling my weight in the boat. It was spoiling sport. And among seven children it got me nowhere. It might reduce four o'cat to three o'cat, but the game went on just the same, and where was I? Out of it. Better go in and join the group around the piano and forget my grievance. Better still, next time don't fling down my bat in a tantrum; keep my temper, and stay in the game.
Here's a rule thumb that's important, and the older I get, the more important I think it is. When I can do something, and somebody wants me to do it, I have to do it. The great tragedy of life is not to be needed. As long as you are able and willing to do things for people, you will be needed. Of course you are able; and if so, you can't say no. My mother is seventy-seven. In seventy-seven years she has never said no. Today she is so much in demand by thirteen grandchildren and countless neighbors that her presence is eagerly contended for. When I want to see her I have to pretend emergency.
Then there's the rule of curiosity. Your body would die if you stopped feeling hunger and thirst, and your mind will die if you lose your curiosity. This I learned from my father. My father was a naturalist. He could see the beetle under the bark, and draw it forth unharmed for us to squint at through the magnifying glass. He sampled the taste of thirty-three different caterpillars. Fired by his example, once, my sister ate an ant. In case you are wondering, caterpillars taste like the green leaves they eat, and ants taste of lemon. I personally haven't tasted any entomological specimens lately, but I am still rejoicing in the limitless curiosity, the draws me to books and people and places.I hope I never lose it. It would be like pulling down the blind.
Finally, there is the rule of happiness. Happiness is a habit. I was taught to cultivate it. A big stomach-ache, or a big heart-ache, can interrupt happiness, but neither can destroy it unless I permit. My mother simply wouldn't have unhappy faces moping about the place. If it was stomach-ache, she does it. If it was heart-ache, she administered love and understanding and lots of interesting things to do, and soon the sun came out again. Even the heartbreaks that can't really be mended, even those seem to yield to the habit of finding happiness in doing things, in love and in the memory of love. I hope I never lose that habit either. It would be like putting out the light.
So I learned to live, by the great laws, and these little rules of thumb. I wouldn't take a million dollars for any one of them, or a million times that for the years at home that taught them to me.
没有我世界照常运转
莉莲·比诺·麦丘
什么是我所信仰的？什么是我生活的准则？答案很多，比如工作、美丽、真理、爱心，但愿我能以它们为准则。然而，生活中的我还履行着另外一套附加的法则，即经验法则。这一法则虽然简单，但却能使事情顺利地进行下去。父母把我送到一所很好的学校学习，但养育了7个孩子，才是他们为我的教育做的最好的事。我是家中长女，而弟弟妹妹就是我最好的老师。
我最先学会了身为长女的责任。对一个想搭顺风车的流浪者来说，会做雪橇的孩子毫无用处。对这些孩子而言，世界也是如此。我学会了睡觉前自己铺床，洗自己用过的杯子，修补自己弄坏的东西，用拖布拖干自己溅到地上的水。如果我过于懒惰、挑剔或忙碌，而让别人来做这些事，马上就会有人教我不能这么做。
于是，我同样也明白了生气于事无补。除了我自己，它伤害不了任何人。在我们家里，闷闷不乐是不会有人搭理你的。尽管不是我的责任，但却会让人觉得扫兴。何况在7个孩子中间生闷气对我并没有好处。没有我，“4只小猫”的游戏变成“3只小猫”，一样可以玩得很好。而我呢？只能被排除在外了。最好的办法就是，忘掉自己的委屈，加入他们，和大家一起围着钢琴玩。还有，最好下次不要再乱发脾气；控制好自己的情绪，继续玩游戏。
此外，还有一条经验法则同样重要。随着慢慢长大，我也越来越认识到它的重要性。当我有能力做一件事，有人也希望我做时，我就必须去做。不为人所需是人生中最大的悲剧。只要你有能力并愿意为人们做一些事，人们就会需要你。你肯定能够做到，那就不要推辞。我的母亲已经77岁了。但77年来她从未说过“不”字。如今，她的13个孙儿和无数的邻居依然很需要她，希望她能在身边。因此当我想见她时，不得不假装有紧急的事情。
除此之外，还有好奇法则。当你感觉不到饥饿和干渴时，你的身体就停止运转了；如果你失去了好奇心，那你的思想就不再工作了。这是父亲传授给我的。他是一位博物学家。他能看到树皮下的甲虫，并把它毫发无伤地捉下来，放在放大镜下让我们看。他尝过33种不同毛虫的味道。有一次，在父亲的示范与鼓励下，妹妹吃了一只蚂蚁。假如你对它们的味道感到好奇，我会告诉你，毛虫的味道就像它们所吃的树叶，而蚂蚁的味道像柠檬。我个人最近并未品尝任何昆虫的标本，但我仍欣喜于自己无限的好奇心，它促使我博览群书、乐于与人交往和四处旅行。我希望永远拥有好奇心。没有它，就仿佛放下了窗帘，让我无法欣赏到窗外的美景。
最后，还有幸福法则。幸福是一种习惯。我学会了去养成这种习惯。剧烈的胃痛与心痛都会阻碍幸福，但没有我的允许，它们绝对无法破坏幸福。母亲不愿意看到家中有人闷闷不乐。如果有人胃痛，母亲会给他吃药；如果是心痛，她会给予爱和理解，并做很多有趣的事让他忘记痛苦，重新展露笑颜。即使心碎了，无法再修补，即使有人习惯在工作、爱与爱的回忆中寻找幸福，我也希望我永远不会将这一习惯丢弃。拥有它，就仿佛点亮了生命的明灯。
因此，我学会了生活，并遵循着伟大的定律与这些琐碎的经验法则。即使给我100万美元，也换不去它们中的任何一个；或者即使给我无尽的时间，也无法交换那些让我懂得这些法则的家中岁月。
美文二:
Occasionally, life can be undeniably, impossibly difficult. We are faced with challenges and events that can seem overwhelming, life-destroying to the point where it may be hard to decide whether to keep going. But you always have a choice. Jessica Heslop shares her powerful, inspiring journey from the worst times in her life to the new life she has created for herself:
In 20xx I had the worst year of my life.I worked in a finance job that I hated and I lived in a concrete jungle city with little greenery. I occupied my time with meaningless relationships and spent copious quantities of money on superficialities. I was searching for happiness and had no idea where to find I fell ill with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) and became virtually bed bound. I had to quit my job and subsequently was left with no income. I lived with my boyfriend of then only 3 months who financially supported me and our relationship was put under great pressure. I eventually regained my physical health, but not long after that I got a call from my family at home to say that my father’s cancer had fiercely progressed and that he had been admitted to a hospice.
I left the city and I went home to be with died 6 months father was a complete inspiration to me. He was always so strong that, for a minute after he drew his last breath, I honestly thought he would come back to life. I couldn’t believe I would never again cuddle into his big warm chest and feel safe no matter grief that followed was intense for all of us 5 children and our mother, but we had each other.
But my oldest sister at that time complained of a bad back. It got so bad after 2 months that she too was admitted to discovered that she had highly advanced cancer in her bones and that there was nothing that they could died 1 month later.I could never put into words the loss of my sister in my was a walking, talking angel and my favourite person in the whole world. If someone could have asked me the worst thing that could ever happen, it would have been losing was my soul-mate and I never thought I would journey this lifetime without her.
你可以选择自己想过的生活
生活有时候困难得难以置信，但又不容置疑。我们面临的挑战与困境似乎无法抵御，试图毁灭我们生活，甚至使你犹疑是否继续走下去。但是你总有选择的余地。从人生低谷走向新生活的杰西卡·赫斯乐普，在这里与我们分享她启迪心灵、充满震撼力的生活之旅。
20xx年是我生活中最艰难的一年。我做着讨厌的财务工作，住在难寻绿色的高楼林立的城市。我忙于无意义的交往，在一些肤浅表面的东西上大笔开销。我寻找快乐，却又不知道它在哪里。然后我患上了慢性疲劳综合症，几乎到了卧床不起的地步。我不得不辞掉工作，同时也就断了财源。我和那时仅相处了3个月的男友住在一起，经济上完全依赖于他，我们的关系承受着巨大压力。终于我恢复健康，但不久，我接到家里的电话，父亲的癌症急剧恶化，已经住进了临终关怀中心。
我离开了城市，回家陪父亲。6个月之后，他去世了。 父亲的事让我彻底清醒。他一直很强壮，在他咽气之后一分钟里，我真的认为，他会活过来。我不能相信，我再也不能依偎在他温暖的怀抱里，享受他宽大的胸怀带给我的安全感。母亲和我们5个兄弟姐妹极为难过，但至少我们还拥有彼此。
但是，那时我大姐开始抱怨着背痛，2个月后，因疼痛加剧也住进了医院。医生们检查发现，她已是骨癌晚期，对此他们已无能为力。1个月之后，她也走了。大姐的逝去让我陷入难以形容的痛苦之中。在这个世界上，她是一个能走路、会说话的天使，我最喜欢的人。如果有人问我，世界上发生的最坏的事情是什么，那就是失去她。她是我的灵魂伴侣，我从来没有想过，我会走过没有她陪伴的生命旅程。
美文三：
The Moment Of Deliberate Choice
The shock and extreme heart break brought me to my knees. The pain was so great and my world just looked desolate. I had no real home, no money, no job, and no friends that cared. Not one person had even sent me a sympathy card for my loss.I made an attempt of my own life and I ended up in hospital.
I remember lying in the hospital bed, looking up at the ceiling and seeing my sister’s beautiful face. She stayed with me all night long.I realised during that night that I had a choice. I could choose to end my life or I could choose to live it.I looked in my sister’s eyes and I made a decision not to go with her just yet. That I would stay and complete my journey here.I also made the decision that, I wouldn’t just live any life. I would live the life that I absolutely LOVE and nothing less.
In that moment, the clarity that descended around me was like a light shining in a dark room for the first time. As if the earth’s plates had shifted under my feet and everything suddenly looked real for the first time.
抉择时刻
我被打击和极度的心痛击挎了。强烈的痛苦使世界在我眼中变得如此凄凉。我没有真正意义上的家，没有钱，没有工作，也没有关心我的朋友。没有一个人因我失去亲人而寄给我慰问卡。我尝试着活下去，结果住进了医院。
我记得，躺在病床上，看着天花板，看到姐姐美丽的面庞。她整夜守候着我。那天晚上，我意识到我可以选择。要么结束生命，要么活下去。望着姐姐的眼睛，我决定不跟她走。我要留下来，走完我的生命旅程。同时，我还决定，不只为生活而生活，我要完全以自己想要的方式生活。
在那一刻，这一想法第一次清晰得如同一盏在黑暗闪烁的明灯。好像脚下的地球版块变换了，每一样东西在我眼前都真实得前所未有。
美文四:
We often close ourselves off when traumatic events happen in our lives; instead of letting the world soften us, we let it drive us deeper into ourselves. We try to deflect the hurt and pain by pretending it doesn’t exist, but although we can try this all we want, in the end, we can’t hide from ourselves. We need to learn to open our hearts to the potentials of life and let the world soften ever we start to let our fears and seriousness get the best of us, we should take a step back and re-evaluate our behavior. The items listed below are six ways you can open your heart more fully and completely：
1. Breathe into pain
Whenever a painful situation arises in your life, try to embrace it instead of running away or trying to mask the hurt. When the sadness strikes, take a deep breath and lean into it. When we run away from sadness that’s unfolding in our lives, it gets stronger and more real. We take an emotion that’s fleeting and make it a solid event, instead of something that passes through utilizing our breath we soften our experiences. If we dam them up, our lives will stagnate, but when we keep them flowing, we allow more newness and greater experiences to blossom.
2. Embrace the uncomfortable
We all know what that twinge of anxiety feels like. We know how fear feels in our bodies: the tension in our necks, the tightness in our stomachs, etc. We can practice leaning into these feelings of discomfort and let them show us where we need to initial impulse is to run away — to try and suppress these feelings by not acknowledging them. When we do this, we close ourselves off to the parts of our lives that we need to experience most. The next time you have this feeling of being truly uncomfortable, do yourself a favor and lean into the feeling. Act in spite of the fear.
3. Ask your heart what it wants
We’re often confused at the next step to take, making pros and cons lists until our eyes bleed and our brains are sore. Instead of always taking this approach, what if we engaged a new part of ourselves that isn’t usually involved in the decision making process?I know we’ve all felt decisions or actions that we had to take simply due to our “gut” impulses: when asked, we can’t explain the reasons behind doing so — just a deep knowing that it had to get done. This instinct is the part of ourselves we’re approaching for answers.
To start this process, take few deep breaths then ask, “Heart, what decision should I make here? What action feels the most right?”See what comes up, then engage and evaluate the outcome.
打开心门拥抱生活
生活发生不幸时，我们常常会关上心门；世界不仅没能慰藉我们，反倒使我们更加消沉。我们假装一切仿佛都不曾发生，以此试图忘却伤痛，可就算隐藏得再好，最终也还是骗不了自己。既然如此，何不尝试打开心门，拥抱生活中的各种可能，让世界感化我们呢？当恐惧与焦虑来袭时，我们应该退后一步，重新反思自己的言行。下面六个方法有助于你更完满透彻地敞开心扉：
1.直面痛苦
当生活中出现痛苦的事情时，别再逃跑或隐藏痛苦，试着拥抱它吧；当悲伤来袭时，试着深呼吸，然后直面它。如果我们一味逃避生活中的悲伤，悲伤只会变得更强烈更真实——悲伤原本只是稍纵即逝的.情绪，我们却固执地耿耿于怀。深呼吸能减缓我们的感受。屏住呼吸，生活停滞；呼出呼吸，更多新奇与经历又将拉开序幕。
2.拥抱不安
我们都经历过焦灼的煎熬感，也都感受过恐惧造成的生理反应：脖子僵硬、胃酸翻腾。其实，我们有能力面对这些痛苦的感受，从中领悟到出路。我们的第一反应总是逃避——以为否认不安情绪的存在就能万事大吉，可这也恰好妨碍了我们经历最需要的生活体验。下次感到不安时，不管有多害怕，也请试着勇敢面对吧。
3.倾听内心
我们常对未来犹疑不定，反复考虑利弊直到身心俱疲。与其一味顾虑重重，不如从局外人的角度看待决策之事。其实很多决定或行动都是我们一念之间的结果：要是追问原因的话，恐怕我们自己也道不清说不明，只是感到直觉如此罢了。而这种直觉恰好是我们探索结果的潜在自我。
开始前先做几次深呼吸，问自己：“内心认为该做什么样的决定呢？觉得采取哪个方案最恰当？”看看自己的内心反应如何，然后全力以赴、静待结果吧。
美文五:
In this life, what did you miss?
The wife asked the husband when she was 25. Despondently, the husband replied: 'I missed a new job opportunity.'
When she was 35, the husband angrily told her that he had just missed the bus.
At 45, the husband sadly said: 'I missed the oppotunity seeing my closed relative before his last breath.'
At 55, the husband said disappointingly: 'I missed a good chance to retire.'
At 65, the husband hurriedly replied: 'I missed a dental appointment.'
At 75, the wife did not ask the husband anymore, the husband was kneeling in front of the very sick wife. Remembering the question the wife used to ask him, this time he asked the wife the same question. The wife, with a smile and peaceful look, replied: 'In this life, I did not miss having you!'
The husband was full of tears. He always thought that they could be together forever. He was always busy with work and trifles. So much so he had never been thoughtful to his wife. The husband hugged the wife tightly and said: 'Over 50 years, how I had allowed myself to miss your deep love for me.'
In the busy city life, there are many people who are always busy with work. These people revolve their lives around their jobs, these people sacrifice all their times and health to meet the social expectations. They are unwilling to spend times on health care. They miss the opportunity to be with their children in their growing up. They neglect the loved ones who care for them, and also their health.
Nobody knows what is going to happen one year from is not permanent, so always live in the now. Express your gratitude to your loved ones in words. Show your care with actions. Treat everyday as the last episode of life. In this way, when you are gone, you loved ones would have nothing to feel sorry about.
在生活中，你错过了什么？
妻子25岁的时候这样问丈夫。丈夫沮丧地回答：“我错过了一个新的工作机会。”
35岁时，丈夫生气地说他错过了公交车。
45岁时，丈夫悲伤地说：“我错过了见至亲最后一面的机会。”
55岁时，丈夫失望地说：“我错过了一个退休的好机会。”
65岁时，丈夫匆匆地回答：“我错过了和牙医的预约。”
75岁，妻子不再问丈夫同样的问题，丈夫跪在病重的妻子面前，想起以前妻子常常问起的那个问题，这次他也问了妻子同样的问题，妻子笑了笑，一脸平静地说：“我这一生，没有错过你！”
丈夫满眼泪水，他总是认为可以和妻子白头到老，于是总是忙于工作和琐事，从没在意过妻子。他紧紧地抱住妻子说：“这50多年来，我怎么能允许自己错过了你对我的爱呢。”
在繁忙的城市生活中，有人总是忙于工作。他们整天围着工作转，甚至为了达到社会的标准，牺牲了自己的健康。他们不愿花时间来关注自己的健康，在孩子成长的过程中错失了与之共享天伦之乐的机会。他们忽视了那些关心他们的人，以及他们的健康。
没有人知道一年后会发生什么事情。生命不是永恒的，所以活在当下吧。把你对爱人的感谢说出来，用行动证明你关心他们。把每一天当作人生的最后一个篇章，只有这样，当你离开时，你爱的人们才会没有遗憾。
美文六:
Truly happy and successful people get that way by becoming the best, most genuine version of themselves they can be. Not on the outside--on the inside. It's not about a brand, a reputation, a persona. It's about reality. Who you really ds simple, I know. It is a simple concept. The problem is, it's very hard to do, it takes a lot of work, and it can take a lifetime to figure it out.
Nothing worth doing in life is ever easy. If you want to do great work, it's going to take a lot of hard work to do it. And you're going to have to break out of your comfort zone and take some chances that will scare the crap out of you know, I can't think of a better way to spend your life. I mean, what's life for if not finding yourself and trying to become the best, most genuine version of you that you can be?
That's what Steve Jobs meant when he said this at a Stanford University commencement speech:Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something--your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle.
Now, let's for a moment be realistic about this. Insightful as that advice may be, it sounds a little too amorphous and challenging to resonate with today's quick-fix culture. These days, if you can't tell people exactly what to do and how to do it, it falls on deaf only that, but what Jobs was talking about, what I'm talking about, requires focus and discipline, two things that are very hard to come by these days. Why? Because, focus and discipline are hard. It's so much easier to give in to distraction and instant gratification. Easy and addictive.
To give you a little incentive to take on the challenge, to embark on the road to self-discovery, here are three huge benefits from working to become the best, most genuine version of yourself.
It will make you happy. Getting to know yourself will make you feel more comfortable in your own skin. It will reduce your stress and anxiety. It will make you a better spouse, a better parent, a better friend. It will make you a better person. Those are all pretty good reasons, if you ask me.
Besides, you really won't achieve anything significant in life until you know the real you. Not your brand, your LinkedIn profile, how you come across, or what anyone thinks of you. The genuine you. There's one simple reason why you shouldn't try to be something you're not, and it's that you can't. The real you will come out anyway. So forget your personal brand and start spending time on figuring out who you really are and trying to become the best version of that you can be.
去经历去体验 做最好最真实的自己
真正快乐成功的人会长成最好最真实的自己——从内心而非外表上。重要的不是品牌、名誉或者外表形象，而是真实的自我。道理很简单，讲出来也很容易。但问题是，做起来就不简单了：这需要付诸很多努力，甚或一辈子才能实现。
需要穷尽毕生精力的事情必定不容易。成大事者必先苦其心志。因此，你必须走出舒适区，去经历、去体验那些会让你害怕的机会。况且，人这一辈子，若到头来都认不清自己、未能长成最好最真实的自己，还有什么意义呢？
正如史蒂夫-乔布斯在斯坦福大学的毕业典礼上所言：时间宝贵，不要虚掷光阴过着他人的生活。不要让周遭的聒噪言论蒙蔽你内心的声音。你要相信，生活中的偶然冥冥中也能指引未来。你要心怀信念——相信你的直觉、命运、生活抑或因缘。这个方法一直给我力量，促使我过得卓然不同。成大事的唯一途径就是做自己喜欢的事情。若你还没找到，那就继续追寻吧，不要停下来。
现在我们来实际一点：建议或许很深刻，但听完却让人无从着手，难以运用到当今的快节奏文化中。现如今，如果一个建议讲不清具体做什么、该怎么做的话，那么说了也等于白说。不仅如此，乔布斯的讲话和我要说的话都需要集中和自制——这两个品质在当今社会非常难能可贵。何以见得？因为集中和自制都不容易做到。人们很容易分散注意力、寻求即时快感——舒服且容易上瘾。
为激励你迎接挑战、踏上寻求自我的旅途，我列出了成为最好最真实自己后的三大益处：
你会感到快乐。了解自己后会让你更愉悦地接受自己，减轻你的压力和焦虑，使你成为更好的伴侣、父母、朋友，让你成为一个更美好的人。这些益处难道不够说服你为之努力吗？
而且，只有了解真实的自己方能成就大事。你需要了解那个真实的你，而不是你的品牌、名誉、LinkedlIn资料、你的过去抑或他人对你的看法。为什么你不应该过他人的生活？很简单，因为首先你不是“其他人”，你的本性总有一天会现形。所以，请放开你的品牌形象，努力发掘真实自我、努力把自己经营成最好的自己吧。
美文七:
Love Is Not Like Merchandise
A reader in Florida, apparently bruised by some personal experience, writes in to complain, "If I steal a nickel's worth of merchandise, I am a thief and punished; but if I steal the love of another's wife, I am free."This is a prevalent misconception in many people's minds---that love, like merchandise, can be "stolen". Numerous states, in fact, have enacted laws allowing damages for "alienation of affections".
But love is not a commodity; the real thing cannot be bought, sold, traded or stolen. It is an act of the will, a turning of the emotions, a change in the climate of the a husband or wife is "stolen" by another person, that husband or wife was already ripe for the stealing, was already predisposed toward a new partner. The "love bandit" was only taking what was waiting to be taken, what wanted to be taken.
We tend to treat persons like goods. We even speak of the children "belonging" to their parents. But nobody "belongs" to anyone else. Each person belongs to himself, and to God. Children are entrusted to their parents, and if their parents do not treat them properly, the state has a right to remove them from their parents' of us, when young, had the experience of a sweetheart being taken from us by somebody more attractive and more appealing. At the time, we may have resented this intruder---but as we grew older, we recognized that the sweetheart had never been ours to begin with. It was not the intruder that "caused" the break, but the lack of a real relationship.
On the surface, many marriages seem to break up because of a "third party". This is, however, a psychological illusion. The other woman or the other man merely serves as a pretext for dissolving a marriage that had already lost its essential ing is more futile and more self-defeating than the bitterness of spurned love, the vengeful feeling that someone else has "come between" oneself and a beloved. This is always a distortion of reality, for people are not the captives or victims of others---they are free agents, working out their own destinies for good or for ill.
But the rejected lover or mate cannot afford to believe that his beloved has freely turned away from him--- and so he ascribes sinister or magical properties to the interloper. He calls him a hypnotist or a thief or a home-breaker. In the vast majority of cases, however, when a home is broken, the breaking has begun long before any "third party" has appeared on the scene.
爱情不是商品
佛罗里达州的一位读者显然是在个人经历上受过创伤, 他写信来抱怨道: “如果我偷走了五分钱的商品, 我就是个贼, 要受到惩罚, 但是如果我偷走了他人妻子的爱情, 我没事儿。”这是许多人心目中普遍存在的一种错误观念——爱情, 像商品一样, 可以 “偷走”。实际上，许多州都颁布法令，允许索取“情感转让”赔偿金。
但是爱情并不是商品；真情实意不可能买到，卖掉，交换，或者偷走。爱情是志愿的行动，是感情的转向，是个性发挥上的变化。当丈夫或妻子被另一个人“偷走”时，那个丈夫或妻子就已经具备了被偷走的条件，事先已经准备接受新的伴侣了。这位“爱匪”不过是取走等人取走、盼人取走的东西。
我们往往待人如物。我们甚至说孩子“属于”父母。但是谁也不“属于”谁。人都属于自己和上帝。孩子是托付给父母的，如果父母不善待他们，州政府就有权取消父母对他们的托管身份。我们多数人年轻时都有过恋人被某个更有诱惑力、更有吸引力的人夺去的经历。在当时，我们兴许怨恨这位不速之客---但是后来长大了，也就认识到了心上人本来就不属于我们。并不是不速之客“导致了”决裂，而是缺乏真实的关系。
从表面上看，许多婚姻似乎是因为有了“第三者”才破裂的。然而这是一种心理上的幻觉。另外那个女人，或者另外那个男人，无非是作为借口，用来解除早就不是完好无损的婚姻罢了。因失恋而痛苦，因别人“插足”于自己与心上人之间而图报复，是最没有出息、最自作自受的乐。这种事总是歪曲了事实真相，因为谁都不是给别人当俘虏或牺牲品——人都是自由行事的，不论命运是好是坏，都由自己来作主。
但是，遭离弃的情人或配偶无法相信她的心上人是自由地背离他的——因而他归咎于插足者心术不正或迷人有招。他把他叫做催眠师、窃贼或破坏家庭的人。然而，从大多数事例看，一个家的破裂，是早在什么“第三者”出现之前就开始了的。
书香门第
